Colonoscopy biopsy results

Biopsies taken during your endoscopic procedure:

_ No cancer found

Findings: continued inflammation with no sign of CMV infection. There was a small area of low-grade dysplasia (low-grade changes that can be precancerous)

considering my previous scope showed pervasive and significant dysplasia, and my docs were talking about cancer and surgery, to now speaking of treatment courses and steady-as-she-goes, POSITIVE MOMENTUM!!!!

Whenever I have a bad flare up…


I’m like:


This is the best depiction for Crohn’s I’ve seen.


This is the best depiction for Crohn’s I’ve seen.

i realized that i actually have been losing sleep in a massive amount consistently in the past few months because - and i only see this in hindsight - i wanted to be successful, more than i cared about sleep.

and my health has been improving too, crohn’s-wise.

this isn’t to say i ‘don’t sleep ever’. I sleep. I sleep enough that i get a rem cycle or two a day and that my cells can repair themselves sufficiently. but i never say to myself, ‘ehhh i have a few more hours this morning ill just fall back asleep.’ Not anymore. These days, I get up and. I. Focus. I focus for as much as I can.

You’ve hit professional IBD status


when you’ve had more colonoscopies and endoscopies than both your parents combined.

Welcome to IBD Land:


Where the calories don’t matter, healthy food is the enemy, and the only drugs that save your life make you sicker.

"Manage your illness. Don’t try to control it. That will destroy you."

tmi health stuff;

Read More





"People know your name, not your story. They’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through. So take their opinions of you with a grain of salt. In the end, it’s not what others think, it’s what you think about yourself that counts. Sometimes you have to do exactly what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else."

Marc Chernoff (via asecondchancetoliveonce)


I’m tired of the voice in my head that screams in disgust with everything I eat.

'hangouts on air'

hey are any of my crohnie followers willing to google handouts on air and talk about ibd stuff or just whatever i want to test the platform out because i hope to use it for some youtube vlogs/etc and since it’s a public thing and supposed to be interactive i figure we might try and make content someone might get use out of.
lemme know :B


when you feel the first cramp


sometimes i have cramps and they make me walk/move rigidly and i have a strained expression and i always think i come off as furious or stewingly unhappy when i’m really just like oh gawwddd it hurrtttsssssss

A message from Anonymous

What are spoons and spoonies?



Oh hey good question thanks for asking! I get this now and then but I’m always happy to answer because it means people are paying attention to chronic illness stuff too! 

So the spoon theory is here. But to summarize it’s a chronically ill person’s way of explaining how little things can take a lot of energy. She uses spoons as a measurement of energy. So say you start the day with 15 spoons (or however many) and you shower- takes a spoon, so does making food, eating food, getting dressed and makeup… get it? So it explains how and why being chronically ill can be so EXHAUSTING.  It also gives an idea of how you have to plan for things when you’re chronically ill vs when you’re healthy you don’t have to worry about things like that.

The chronically ill community has taken to using the term “spoonies” to refer to themselves.

It’s important to note that as a healthy person (if you are) you don’t get to refer to your energy as spoons. It’s not the same, really. You have a normal amount of energy most likely and it just sits with people wrong.  It’s like saying you understand what it’s like to be really chronically sick when you just… don’t. 

You may hear me say “oh I used up all my spoons doing this” It just means I pushed myself way too hard doing something and now I feel like crap. 

All in all, it’s a great way to better understand the chronically ill people in your life! It shows how someone like me with a chronic illness has to think about everything I do to plan for my health. So please, if you have a minute, go read it (I linked at the top!) and thanks for asking! 


Reblogging this for her answer, it was an excellent explanation of the spoon theory and mine are definitely negative in numbers.

Ce la vie

Sometimes it super gets me down that through my health I indirectly am excluded to a degree from some of my best friends’ social circle who’s foundation rests in quidditch. I am unable to play and as such have a sort of barrier standing in between me and the tribe. I will never be included in certain events and gatherings and that leaves me ever at the edge kind of looking in instead of being “one of us/them”.
Prompted after I realized most of this clique is gifting each other but that I found it out secondhand. I also haven’t anyone to mutually holiday gift except some relatives because of convention. My closest friends have celebrated my birthday but it really stinks to seem unimportant /unincluded in what I consider to be my social web, to the point of not celebrating December holidays together.
Maybe I’m just projecting though and I’m not actually as good of friends with as many of them as I think and…
Idk. Sometimes I have a hunch I’m seen as a kind of Luna lovegood type that people tolerate but don’t really understand or who think is weird /crazy